We had just moved house and were sitting together on the kitchen floor, putting together about the 10th Ikea cupboard of the day. Out of nowhere, panic and fear struck me and heavy tears flooded down my cheeks.

“What is it?” said my partner.

“I feel really scared. I don’t know anything at all about how to get the baby out”.

He reassured me, “You won’t be alone. There will be people there who deliver babies all the time. They will know what to do and it will definitely find a way out”.

That moment was before I had taken any antenatal classes or read any books and I’m told that it is completely normal to have those fears. A wise friend told me, “Your body will know exactly what to do when it comes to it” and that helped a lot.

I’m still having moments of panic as the due date gets closer but I have found some really helpful resources, which I turn to to keep myself feeling positive about a completely unknown situation. There are two books that were recommended by someone in a Positive Birthing Movement Group that I follow on Facebook. The first is ‘Bump: How to make, grow and birth a baby’ by Kate Evans. It’s really informative but has lots of cartoons, which make it easy and quick to read, plus it’s very funny and reassuring. It is so good that I have just started reading Kate’s follow up book, ‘The food of love: the easier way to breastfeed your baby’. That’s the next situation I’m feeling a bit scared about! But the book is helping hugely.

The second book I turned to in my moment of birth fear was ‘Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth’ by Ina May Gaskin. It has a section full of positive birth stories and a lot of practical, experienced advice on giving birth from the mother of all American midwives, who runs a birth centre. If I have any negative feelings about birth I turn to this as a positive top up.

I’ve also got a very close friend who is 4 weeks ahead of where I am in pregnancy and we have sent each other lots of messages about topics like this. Knowing someone else who is going through the same thing has been invaluable and she has often made me laugh about something that I was afraid of. That has been the best way of dealing with fear and panic for me!